When it comes to sexuality there is no shortage of labels assigned to lifestyles. Homosexual, heterosexual and bisexual are terms we are all familiar with. In terms of recognition, bi-curiosity is the new kid on the sexuality block. Most people have their own definitions of what each lifestyle entails. Opinions and/or phobias are formed based primarily on ignorance and the inability to think outside the established societal box.There are identifiable behaviors that are common to the “big three” that separate it from bi-curiosity – behavior, orientation and identification. Sexual orientation is established at birth but is neither realized nor actualized until years later and is marked by a specific gender preference such as romantic responses, feelings, and desires. The attendant behavior includes the gender selection of a partner. Sexual identification is usually the group of affiliation. In the case of bi-curiosity because there is neither a lifestyle nor a preference and there is no sexual identification affiliation. More times than not it is the desire for sexual experiences between members of the same sex, however, occasionally homosexuals will experience a curiosity to have sex with a member of the opposite sex.
Gender flexibility is usually nothing more than satisfying a curiosity or scratching a particular sexual itch as it were. There is neither an emotional component nor quality of life issue involved. It is merely a sexual exercise to answer a question of whether or not same sex sexual stimulation is a satisfying experience.
Two of the most famous studies of the demographics of human sexual orientation were Dr. Alfred Kinsey’s Sexual Behavior in the Human Male (1948) and Sexual Behavior in the Human Female (1953). These studies used a seven-point spectrum to define sexual behavior, from 0 for completely heterosexual, to 6 for completely homosexual. Kinsey concluded that all but a small percentage of the population were to one degree or another bisexual (falling on the scale from 1 to 5). He also reported that 37% of men in the U.S. had achieved orgasm through contact with another male after adolescence… -Source: Wikipedia
A recent interview with a bi-curious male gives insight as to one possible avenue of how men begin to realize their same sex curiosity. It is a well established fact that physiology plays an important role in male sexuality. He was in his early 40’s and recounted how during one of his heterosexual relationships his partner would engage in mechanical anal sex play which was very enjoyable. He began to wonder what anal intercourse with a man would feel like and if it would feel any different in terms of intensity. The fantasy continues as he has not engaged in that type of same sex sexual contact to date. He related that at a later date during a conversation with an openly bi-sexual female the question of bi-curiosity was again raised. Her contention was that if it feels good, a same sex encounter might be just as satisfying. Her suggestion was to visit an adult bookstore and wait to see if he was approached by another make patron. As he sat masturbating while watching porn in a video booth in an adult bookstore, an unidentified male approached him and began to perform oral sex on him which was very enjoyable. When I asked if he experienced feelings of confusion, guilt or angst he replied no. I then asked if he went to the bookstore expecting to have a same sex oral sex encounter to which he replied in the affirmative. This was to be a true test of his presumed bi-curiosity and whether or not he would find the encounter pleasurable or a complete turn-off. The curiosity seemed focused more on which gender could provide the most intense orgasmic release under unique circumstances. Apparently men who engage in this type of behavior are seeking a “get it done” physical release type situation. Foreplay is not an option and the no harm, no foul rule is in play. Several other interviews with bi-curious men seemed to echo similar sentiments. When questioned as to whether or not they felt their bi-curiosity was a manifestation of some latent homosexual tendencies, the response was a collective and decisive no. Universally they agreed that it was more a desire for anal penetration and inquisitiveness regarding the difference between oral sex performed by a woman as opposed to being performed by a man. Most admitted to having been introduced to anal sex by a partner using some sort of vibrator or strap-on device. These interviews also strongly suggested that the “partners” were generally experienced gay men or bisexual men who were comfortable with same sex encounters; however, visits to several male bi-curious websites indicated that there are “communities” of straight bi-curious males seeking the same. The respondents ran the gambit from married and single professional men to blue collar workers to college students who admitted that their first encounter usually occurred at a party where covert sexual activity was occurring. The men also revealed that many times the encounters were an attempt to sexually please a female partner who enjoyed voyeuristic male to male interaction. The men revealed their greatest fear of discovery was that their home lives and other relationships would be upset due to the narrow mindedness of their significant others and/or friends.There will always be great debate on the morality of certain sexual behaviors but currently gender flexibility remains a closeted affair with virtually no possibility of a social coming out and it remains in the netherworld of sexual acceptability. ©2007 Marsha Dean WalkerAll rights reserved
When it comes to sexuality there is no shortage of labels assigned to lifestyles. Homosexual, heterosexual and bisexual are terms we are all familiar with. In terms of recognition, bi-curiosity is the new kid on the sexuality block. Most people have their own definitions of what each lifestyle entails. Opinions and/or phobias are formed based primarily on ignorance and the inability to think outside the established societal box.